First Crock-Potting Experience - Chicken Noodle Soup
Life lesson #1: Don’t ever go to the food store on a Sunday. It’s Hell. Literally where the Devil holds all of the crazy, sexually frustrated moms & couples that take up the whole aisle fighting over whether they should get Light or Regular Balsamic Vinaigrette. They’re both going to suck; everyone knows Ranch is the shit.
So I accepted the fact that misery loves company, took my cart, and entered the flames.
After playing bumper cars with two bimbos in aisle 2, I grabbed the following:
2 Medium Carrots
2 Stalks of Celery
1 Medium Onion
2 Cloves of Garlic
2 14oz cans of Low Sodium Chicken Broth
1 10 ¾oz can of Fat Free Cream of Chicken Soup
1 16oz Bag of Egg Noodles (you’ll only use half if you want to buy a smaller bag)
1lb of Boneless 98% Fat Free Chicken
½ tspn black pepper
And $22 worth of fucking spices: ½ tspn of Thyme, Rosemary, & Sage
(My mother tells me it’s worth it – need to “build” your spice collection. God, I hope she’s right.)
At first I couldn’t find the garlic… went to the produce section, figuring it would be by the onions. Immediately got distracted by the Sale sign for Cupcake Red Velvet wines - fucking gold. I snap out of it and realize I need to actually ask someone where the garlic is (yes, I’m feeling as pathetic as you’re thinking).
“Oh Miss, it’s near the front. With the popular goods.”
What the hell? I walk… I turn and quickly find the garlic. Not only do I find the garlic but I discover these “popular goods” - Tomatoes, garlic, batteries, condoms, and Gatorade. Riiiiight…… only in America.
Anyway.
The original recipe is slightly different, I do know a few tips to making things healthier. This is shocking, I know.
- Always pick a low sodium broth or soup if you can
- American Choice brand Egg Noodles have 1.5 grams less fat per serving than most brands
- Fat-free: less taste but you feel better about yourself
- Most chicken noodle soup recipes will call for thighs or breast with the bone; if you get boneless breasts, way less calories
You chop the vegetables and mince the garlic. Slice up the chicken, thin one-inch slices. Take your spices and crush them.
Toss it all in the crock-pot.
Add cream of chicken soup.
Add Broth.
Turn crock-pot on high.
Mix, cover, sit on your tush for 3 1/2 hours.
It was very thick the first time I made it. I would add at least a cup of water after you see the consistency once heated.
It was very thick the first time I made it. I would add at least a cup of water after you see the consistency once heated.
Mix intermittently & at about the 3-hour mark, add the noodles. Let them cook for another 30-45 minutes. Taste and let it go another 1/2 or so if the veggies aren't done (they should be really soft when "done")
Salt to taste then stuff your face.
This will make about 8-10 servings, aka the only thing I’ll be eating all week. A serving is a generous cup standing tall at only 203 calories, 6 g total fat, 2g carbs, 0 g fiber, 34 g protein (nutrition facts from original recipe, my version is most likely less in calories & definitely less in fat).
Shout out to my wonderful Mom who gave me the slow cooker this fall – you all need to get one, it’s amazing, the damn thing cooks for you. My beautiful Grandmother gave me the cookbook where the original recipe came from – Better Homes and Gardens. You will be seeing A LOT of recipes from this gem.
Remember bitches, it’s important to be healthy but you can be skinny when you’re dead.
Enjoy.
Looks delish!!! Will definitely be trying this recipe. Gotta love anything that cooks itself...
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